I find myself in the envious position of having four weeks between teaching commitments with very few demands on my time. My online Breakdown Your Palette workshop is ticking along smoothly, there are no hints of impending crisis / distraction on the family front and my ‘bits and bobs’ to do list is pretty short.

So I am free to make ART! I have a ‘Cadence’ quilt in my head that is screaming to get out so the timing is good. This new series is inspired by the joy of process, the joy of making. And it certainly is joyous to be able to immerse myself in it. The fact that spring is here and we’re enjoying a spell of warm, sunny weather just adds to the sense of well-being that comes with making.

Now that I’ve cleared out the drain on my screen washing trough (it’s a glamourous life!) I have been able to spend this last week breakdown printing. I started by making and drying 25 embedded object type breakdown screens. I used the same set of objects over and over again so that there are common shapes and marks on my printed fabrics. I worked with seven of the darker value colours from a colour family and kept each colour separate so have printed a set of mostly monochromatic fabrics. And what a glorious collection of fabrics they are! Ranging from turquoise to a muted grey-purple these are definitely fabrics that make my heart sing. And I have plenty - I printed about 18 square metres this week and have lots of lighter value fabric in the same colourway left over from an earlier printing session.

Next up - cutting the fabrics up then ‘composing’ the quilt! One week down, three to go.

Being an artist is more than just making art. At least it is for me as I believe showing work to others is an important part of calling myself an artist with a capital A. In a perfect world exhibition organisers, curators and galleries would somehow know that I had just finished a piece of fantastic art and would be beating down my door to get at it …..

Unfortunately it doesn’t work like that and so a significant part of most artists life is self-promotion, filling out calls for entry, submitting exhibition proposals and, if successful, shipping pieces across the world (which is increasingly difficult and worthy of a post in itself). As you may have noticed I’m pretty active on the self promotion front but I have to admit that I’ve let some things drift whilst I have focussed on teaching and writing.

Before I got distracted I kept a file of potential ‘calls for entry’ that looked at least 18 months ahead so that I could identify ‘targets’ and work to have suitable quilts ready for specific dates. I work in series and have found trying to respond to other peoples themes rather disappointing. I discard many opportunities to exhibit because of that and only keep a list of those that don’t have specific themes or have themes, such as ‘Structures’ that might fit with my work. Or I did. Having a few scraps of paper in a random pile does not count as a proper list. I have put that right and now have a well organised file of ‘calls for entry’. Most are in the quilt world but I’ve also decided that now is the time to venture out in the bigger textile world. Having a list doesn’t mean success. The more you submit work, the more rejections you get. But, as the saying goes, you have to be in it to win it’!

The other thing I used to be very disciplined about was submitting proposals for exhibition, either on my own or with others. Curators are often working one or two years ahead. Some artists prepare a collection of work and then submit proposals but most, myself included, submit proposals when they only have ‘work in progress’ and maybe one or two finished pieces. I haven’t done that for a long time and I could kick myself as there is almost certainly a back log due to Covid. And the success rate is even lower than ‘calls for entry’. I don’t have anything in the pipeline and realistically can’t expect to having a solo exhibition for at least two or three years. Ho hum!!

The good news though is that I am now feeling very happy with the work that I’m creating. To the extent that I’ve submitted a couple of pieces to a couple of calls for entry. I can’t share images of the full quilts but have included a photo of the detail in one piece above. And, more importantly, I know that I have a new series. By that I mean that I have an inspiration / set of ideas that has enough breadth and has engaged me so deeply that I know I can produce more pieces of art exploring the same theme. I am calling this new series Cadence as its inspiration has come from the regular and repeated process of making breakdown screens, printing fabric, washing fabric, cutting fabric, arranging and piecing fabric, layering and stitching. And because I think it is a lovely word.

Feeling connected to my process again is wonderful and means that I have the confidence to write new proposals for exhibition. To look further ahead on days when the present is so dark. So watch this space!

Last time I wrote about my sense of disconnection from my art and I’d like to thank everyone who got in touch. Your support, and knowing that many of you share my sense of disconnection, really helps. This pandemic has turned our worlds upside down in so many ways but I cannot blame my lack of connection to my art on the pandemic alone. As I wrote before there were fissures already there, I think, from the changes in my life over recent years.

So how do I reconnect? There are lots of things I could try. I could take a workshop and learn a new technique in the hope that it sparks something. I could pick a call for entry with a set theme and a deadline and force myself to work on it just to be doing something, again in the hope it sparks something. Or I could start some form of daily practice, maybe something that is outside my ‘comfort zone’ such as sketching. These methods work really well for some people but I know myself and I know that these ideas won’t work for me. I’ve worked into sketchbooks and worked to other peoples themes often enough to recognise that they are not for me.

Instead I have spent time looking back and thinking about what has worked really well for me in the past. I don’t want to reinvent myself. I am not questioning the processes I have used in the past. I am looking for new inspiration that is a better fit with my life today. I know from experience that I do not make good art if I have a great idea and start working on it straightaway. The two quilts I made in April are a good example of this. I also know that my ideas rattle around in my head and evolve best when I’m busy printing and stitching - I really don’t do sitting around waiting for the muse!

Which is a bit of a conundrum. So I have stopped thinking about finding new inspiration. Instead I am trusting my process and trying to create abstract pieces that I can fall in love with. Some may say that this is taking the easy option but honestly now is not the right time for me to work on pieces with deep meaning. I am being kind to myself. I have picked a colour family to work with that is rather lovely. I have used breakdown printing to create a palette of fabrics. I am using simple compositions, based on different width strips and simple shapes, to create a series of full sized quilts. And I’m spending many, many hours sat at my machine stitching.

Some of the fabrics I have printed so far haven’t worked and some of the compositions I’ve played with haven’t made it off my design wall. Over the last few weeks I have finished one quilt that is boring and have stopped working on another piece part way through quilting. But I am slowly working towards pieces that are interesting. I haven’t got to the ‘wow’ moment but I will keep going. I don’t know where I will end up. I may end up with a successful series of abstract pieces. Or I may start thinking about a new source of inspiration that eventually leads to new work and end up throwing these pieces away. I feel that the process I am going through needs to be a private one so I’m not going to share images until I know which way this is going. Some of you may shudder at the idea of quilts going in the bin but I see this as an investment in me. A necessary investment. And a positive focus at the end of a very difficult year.

May I take a moment to wish each of you a peaceful Christmas in which you can find moments of happiness.

All my love, Leah

To say 2020 hasn’t gone as planned would be a bit of an understatement. At the beginning of this year my focus was on making art and on teaching. I had intentionally delayed plans to grow my online shop and to write my second book as I wanted to slow down a bit after a hectic 2019 and spend more time with my family.

But in March everything changed. With no income from teaching I quickly switched gears and spent time developing my online shop. Like many people I really struggled to focus on anything but found comfort in printing fabric to sell.

As my focus returned I decided to take a few weeks ‘off’ to make art. The pieces that I had been working on before March felt completely irrelevant. I had zero desire to work on that series so, like many other artists, I decided to use my response to the corona virus as my inspiration. I followed my usual creative process - I chose my colours first then printed fabric before thinking about composition. Whilst I enjoyed the process the two quilts I created were a bit disappointing. In fact one of them is just plain ugly. Under normal times I would have thrown those in the bin and kept going. I felt frustrated but didn’t have the emotional strength to figure out why they weren’t ‘right’.

Instead I threw myself into writing my second book. I took breaks to teach when restrictions allowed but I can honestly say that I stopped thinking about making art. I did enter a quilt I had made at the beginning of the year into several juried exhibitions but it was rejected over and over again. Normally this would really upset me but it didn’t. I like the quilt and would happily hang it on a wall in my home but just don’t feel as connected to it as I do my earlier work.

Eventually the book was finished. Having seriously over worked myself I was forced to really slow down for a few weeks. My mind turned to making art. And I realised that I have lost my way. I have lost the sense of connection with my work and I have lost the habit of making art. My life has changed completely in recent years. I no longer work in industry, based in an old cotton mill, surrounded by heavy machinery. I work in my studio. I no longer travel around the world with my job. Even before the pandemic I barely travelled anywhere and now I spend 99% of my time inside the boundaries of our property. I no longer have a clean separation between my art and my day job. My art is, or at least should be, part of my day job.

When I changed career and started teaching it was so that I could combine being an artist, cope with the increasing care responsibilities I have and still pay the bills. I was adamant that I wanted to be an artist who taught rather than a teacher who makes the odd bit of art. It was inevitable that there would be periods when my focus was 100% on growing my teaching practice and writing books but I failed to recognise that the connection I felt to my art was in part driven by the fact that previously I worked on my art everyday not in chunks of a week here and a week there.

Local restrictions currently prevent me teaching and I fear that this will continue into the new year. I could spend this time starting my next book, creating more thermofax designs for my shop, or developing online workshops but I’m not. I’m spending the time looking inwards, trying to reconnect with my art and figuring out how I sustain this once I am able to teach.

I will write about this in more detail next time but I will share something I have done that is helping me. It is a little thing but I have, temporarily, removed the big plastic ‘Covid safe’ screens from the studio and have rearranged the tables. Whilst those screens are necessary they just make me want to cry. By removing them I feel like I am reclaiming my creative space. A little step towards reconnecting.

I think I’ve got my artistic mojo back! Time will tell if anybody else agrees but right now I am feeling in a good place. I have spent the last week or so trying to cut out all the distractions, trying to quiet all those negative, anxious thoughts and instead focus on creating. Of course the outside world has continued to be a source of anxiety and fear so I decided to be kind to myself and set aside pushing any boundaries until a happier time.

Instead I took two decisions upfront. Firstly I decided to work with a colour family I developed several years ago and used in my Dunure series of works. At the time our oldest son was in a very dark place and life was the hardest we have ever known. The colour palette was inspired by the scrubby beach at Dunure, Scotland on a grey, stormy November day and the series was a reflection of the effect of place on my mental well being. I had hoped that I would never return to this series and this colour palette but here we are.

Secondly I decided to work with circles and specifically broken or fragmented circles. I tend to call my work ‘abstract’ but the reality is that I like to make marks that relate to my inspiration. Inspiration seems like the wrong word in this case but of course this new work is a response to the virus. Small envelopes of protein that invade our bodies, multiple and corrupt our cells. That separate us from our loved ones.

Of course I have been using breakdown printing to create my fabrics - my studio equivalent of comfort eating. And I have been using bondaweb to fuse fabrics together as my patience levels are not high enough to be piecing curved edges right now. But I think I am getting somewhere. And I’m going to stick at it for a while.

Which means no new fabric packs on the website for another week - sorry.

Stay safe, stay well, Leah

Well maybe not quite as busy as 2019! A full teaching schedule, writing and publishing my first book, an absolutely amazing solo gallery at Festival of Quilts and unexpected drama on the home front meant 2019 was a bit of a roller-coaster ride. No wonder that I have spent a lot of the Christmas break sleeping!

However I did get into the studio most days even if only for an hour or two and spent my time working on the first two full pieces in my new series. I have given the series a working title of ‘Democracy’. I could have called the series Brexit but I want to make pieces that express my broader concerns about politics, the proliferation of lies and fake news and the way our political leadership is changing. And although the individual quilts may reference events in the UK I hope they will resonated with people in other countries. Despite the rather gloomy subject matter I am thoroughly enjoying working on a series. And, as per usual, I am spending lots of time machine stitching straight lines!

But the holidays are over and it is back to work for me. 2020 got off to a flying start - yesterday I gave a talk to the Manchester Branch of the Embroiderer’s Guild. This was the first of 8 talks I’ll be giving this year and the first of 4 that I’ll be giving to branches of the Embroiderer’s Guild. I arrived with a car boot full of quilts including some of the pieces I’ve exhibited in recent years. And, as you will already know, most of my pieces are big. Really big. Which means that some are quite heavy. So a big thank you to the ladies and gentleman who volunteered to hold them up! The difference in scale between my work and some of the pieces being worked on in the room could not be greater.

I also took along some older quilts and some sketchbooks from the City & Guild’s Diploma I did with the lovely and talented Linda Kemshall many years ago. Whilst doing my diploma I figured out that if you work onto separate sheets rather than directly into a sketchbook you can choose what you share. And you can back engineer a lovely looking sketchbook after you have finished making a quilt. OK, so I learnt that you could cheat. But much, much more importantly I learnt that I didn’t need to work into sketchbooks to produce art. It might not have been the intention of the course but this learning was an big step forward for me.

As well as talks I have a full teaching schedule this year. Most of my classes for the first half of the year are sold out but I still have odd places on my Simply Screen Printing workshop and my Print Your Palette workshop. I will also be welcoming my first three guest tutors into the studio. The workshops with Alice Fox and Christine Chester are sold out but there is still one place left on Ruth Browns Books for Textile Artists.

I will be demonstrating at The Creative Craft shows in Glasgow and Birmingham in March and will have a stand at this summers Festival of Quilts. And I am delighted to have a gallery at the West Country Quilt and Textile Show in August. Phew! There was me thinking it wouldn’t be as busy as 2019!

Understanding and embracing your own creative process is incredibly powerful. It takes away that ‘where do I start moment’. It helps you ride out those days when everything you print looks like a disappointing fuzzy, mucky mess. It increases the chances of printing a fuzzy, mucky mess when that is just what you want. And it allows you to wrap yourself in the gentle warmth that comes from creating. Just what I need right now!

There is no ‘one size fits all’ when it comes to creative process. It’s a deeply personal thing. How many articles have you seen that proclaim that working in a messy, chaotic studio increases creativity? I saw one this week and sighed (again). If you can work in a mess then why would you stop to tidy up? But if a mess distracts you then cleaning up before you move on doesn’t make you less creative. It means you understand your creative process. Some people like to work through their ideas thoroughly in a sketchbook, others just jump straight in and accept that they may make some ugly ducklings before they successfully transfer what is in their head to their cloth. Some artists like to complete one piece of work before starting another; others find it more productive to have multiple pieces on the go. We’re all different.

Those that have been reading this blog for a while will know that once the ideas rattling around in my head have reached ‘critical mass’ and are demanding to find expression I start by experimenting with colour. Once I think I have blended the right colours I print a few metres of fabric using marks that sort of fit with my ideas. I don’t really stress about what I actually print - I am using the process to decide if my colours are good. Colours which look OK as small squares scraped onto white fabric don’t always look OK when used in large areas alongside other colours. More often than not I will then adjust my colours and print some more fabric. In the series that I am currently developing I did this a couple of times before having a big rethink and starting again with a different colour family. My subject / inspiration is the current state of UK politics. Irrespective of where you stand politically this is a pretty dark and depressing subject so my initial colours featured drab blacks and brown colours. Hmmm. Turns out that I just can’t work with dark, depressing and drab colours. And why would I keep working on a series if I’m working with colours that make me miserable? Tortured artist? No thanks.

Fortunately I had found the right colours before our recent domestic hiccup. I don’t think I could have got back into the studio if I was making myself work with colours I didn’t like. Instead, with my colour family selected, I have been able to spend a few hours here and a few hours there printing cloth. I warmed up by just adding colour to cloth using an open screen and some thermofax screens I had already made using newspaper headings from the day after the illegal prorogation of parliament. As I printed I got more ideas. Using block text to create positive and negative shapes. Combing breakdown printing and text. Using my new Brother Scan N Cut to scale up and make stencils of scribbled patterns. Varying scale. Utilising different parts of my colour family to create ‘light’ and ‘dark’ cloth. Using different fabrics such as linen to introduce slightly different textures. Some pieces went through just one process but most had two or three layers of mark. I love every part of this process, even washing out my fabrics and washing up my screens. Happy hands, happy heart. Fabulous!

As I was printed I started to think about construction. I’m a piecer. Although I used wholecloth for my series inspired by coal mining, piecing is my comfort zone. And comfort zone feels good right now. I cut some different size apertures from paper to help me decide what size pieces to work with. I like the idea of letters, words and sentences being partially seen so opted for narrow, long pieces. I cut up about a quarter of each piece of fabric then laid the pieces out on my design table in a random way. No cherry picking allowed!

At this stage I often decide that I need to print more fabric - maybe to adjust the colour balance but not this time. Although I did think it needed the addition of a complimentary colour to help draw the eye in. I found a reel of red thread and experimented stitching letters and words onto some pieces. The text wasn’t visible enough but I loved the colour - a good, solid, socialist red! So I mixed some textile inks to match the thread colour and printed onto some of my ‘white’ fabric pieces. I still want to play around with this but decided to go ahead and stitch my fabrics together.

And I am really happy. I trusted my creative process and it has got me from white fabric to a layered sample that (just!) needs quilting. My lovely husband is doing well; I’m still tired but, once again, my studio and my art practice is helping my heal.

I had been warned that I might feel a little ‘flat’ after the roller coaster / adrenalin rush that was Festival of Quilts. If I was still living my old life and had had to return to the day job I think that would definitely have been the case. But luckily I’m not living that life. I’m living one in which I get to work in my studio every day - my idea of heaven! I’ve had lots of bits and bobs to do to prepare for upcoming workshops and events but have also spent lots of time thinking about ‘what next?’ for me as an artist.

Although I have been super busy making art in recent months the development work for those pieces was done some time ago. I developed my Ruins series in 2015. It was a breakthrough moment for me that came after months of work playing with colour and learning about breakdown printing. I started work on the paler pieces inspired by the destruction of the coal mining industry in 2017. Again the first quilt came after months of work learning how I could combine breakdown and discharge to create a very striped back palette. I’m pretty sure that I will make more pieces in both series that will be meaningful and, hopefully, worth exhibiting. But they won’t necessarily challenge me or help me develop as an artist.

The print series was developed last summer. But, if I am being honest with myself, it was rushed. The decision to start teaching and to write a book interrupted that process and I am not as happy with it as I could be. There are some pieces that I really like - Franklin Gothic Heavy (above) is the one I like most and I’m delighted to announce that it has been accepted into this years Quilt-Art-Quilt exhibition. But I think I need to take a step back and rethink. No idea what that will mean yet but I’m just going to play around with some of the fabrics and see what happens.

I also want to start work on a set of ideas, thoughts and emotions about politics, the media and censorship that have been rolling about in the dark recesses of my mind for some time. I have no idea how these ideas will be expressed on cloth but I do know how my ‘creative process’ tends to work so I’m going to set myself some ‘technical’ challenges to get started. Now that I have more time I want to learn more about dyeing and printing on fabrics other than cotton. I want to look at different dye systems. And I want to learn a lot more about the discharge process. The scientist in me will be very happy carrying out lots of experimentation over the coming months. And while my hands are busy my mind will, hopefully, make connections, ideas will find form and I will discover if they are interesting enough to sustain a series of new pieces.

Armed with industrial strength antihistamines, nasal spray and eye drops I am back to being a fully functioning human being. Which meant that I was able to spend last week doing the printing I had planned for Easter weekend. Oh yes!

I enjoy every part of creating my art quilts but the bit I love best is the printing. Especially if it is breakdown printing. Turning white fabric into a big pile of totally unique printed fabric is so, so satisfying.

Of course there was a lot of work involved but I printed about 20 square metres of fabric for my new ‘Print’ series. This will give me more than enough fabric to finish the pieces I have planned for my exhibition at Festival of Quilts. The weather was good at the beginning of the week so I was able to soda soak and dry more white fabric. I made up more breakdown screens, some using black thickened dye and some using print paste. For the first time this year I was able to dry some of the screens outside. Others were dried on top of a radiator. Most screens featured grids but I included a couple of screens that I made by using wooden print blocks to stamp dye onto the screen. (All this is covered in my book ‘Breakdown Your Palette’).

Once I had a stack of dried screens I pinned out fabric on my big print bench and started printing. Bliss! I varied how I printed in order to create a palette of printed fabric that included dark, medium and light fabrics. I stopped to wash, dry and iron the fabrics I had printed every couple of days so that I could check that I was getting the ‘balance’ I wanted. Yes, I even enjoy washing out my fabrics! And it is only time you will ever see a smile on my face when I’m ironing. All-in-all a great week. I can recommend it!